The other day I took the kids to the park. As I was glancing at my phone, two women approached me. "Hey!" They shouted, "We’re part of Stroller Strides!" Oh god.. I thought. "We’re a work out mom group. Here’s a flyer, check it out!" This was about the 9th time I’ve been approached by a stroller mom club since having kids. In my mind I’m thinking. Do I look like I’d even be remotely interested? Do you think I want to pay $65 a month to do sit ups on the grass with a bunch of women that only talk about what their kids ate for dinner? “Thanks for the flyer, I’ll look into it.” Lying through my teeth.
As I sat there, I started to watch the moms for a minute, enjoying their time with one another. I realized in that moment, not only was I internally being the biggest stuck up asshole, but I should instead be supporting the different ways we approach all realms of motherhood. Just because I don’t find something appealing to my personality or taste, doesn't mean it's wrong. It just means it's not for me. Period.
We all have the commonality of going through pregnancy, birthing a child and trying our best to raise decent human beings. However, our distinctions from each other are just as apparent, and well.. why do we care?
So, let’s start off by discussing a couple topics(2 to be frank- because I'm too lazy to write about more than that), that moms seem to secretly butt heads on:
Breastfeeding vs Formula:
My thoughts: WHO GIVES A SHIT!
I formula fed Scout because I went back to work full time, 6 weeks postpartum. It’s what fit my schedule and sanity.
I breast fed Canyon because I was at home and he would not for the love of god take a bottle.
I did BOTH, and I don’t regret either choice. It’s what worked for myself and baby at the time.
Formula feeding moms- Don’t let society make you feel like you’re child will be malnourished if he doesn’t get your direct milk supply. He will survive, I promise.
Breastfeeding moms- Don’t let society make you feel like you shouldn’t pull out your boobs whenever the hell you feel like it because CLEARLY that is what they were ACTUALLY meant for, (although your husband might argue that).
And side note- This does not apply to most, but just saying, please don’t be judgmental for those that choose bottle. You don’t know their situation. Breast isn’t always best.
Organic VS Conventional
My thoughts: WHO GIVES A SHIT!
I PERSONALLY try to shop all organic. We live in a time where we know more about what is in our foods, and to me not having my kids consume one processed or pesticide infested meal after another makes me sleep a little better at night.
HOWEVER, I don’t deprive them of a happy meal once in awhile, and I certainly don’t see why the hell anyone else cares what I give my kids. Because frankly, I don’t care what you feed yours! If you want to feed your children kale for every meal, go for it. If you want to feed them Doritos and Mountain Dew, go for it! Not my kid, not my problem.
I feed my kids a certain way, and should never feel judgment for it, because they are MY kids. Same goes for the outside world. If little Suzie has Cheetos and Snickers in her lunch box-, keep it cool granola friends. Remember not your kid!
And another side note- yes, we should all try to eat a little healthier, not only for our long term health, but also for our planet. BUT unless someone is willing to do so, don’t judge their meal choices or what they feed their kids. It’s their body, their health, and it doesn’t apply to you.
So what is the moral of the story? I'm not perfect (times 1,000). None of us are. We all raise our kids differently. You have young moms and older moms. Rocker moms and soccer moms. Straight moms and gay moms(and dads! HEYYY!) Stay at home moms and career moms. As long as your child is fed, clothed with a roof over their head and given unconditional love...then you're doing something right.
Lets all try to chill out on the judgment, myself included.